August 16, 2012

What is the nicest thing about your son?

                          Before I realise the long summer evenings of blogging and lazing in my sofa are gone, here arrives our big bundle of troublesome joys, back from his long awaited summer vacation. Being the happy and proud parents of a 9 year old who traveled across the globe all by himself, we pick him up at the SFO airport. He mesmerizes us with his charm, peace and new found calmness through meditation. As pessimistic as I could be, I wanted to savour the moments of bliss before the dragon enters. Saturday and Sunday were two days of my life I would want to hold on forever. I think I felt the same way after he was back from his last summer vacation too. :)
                       School started on Monday, he woke up and let out a big scream: Yayy...welcome to 4th grade. He wore the new pair of clothes that I got for him, the new lunch bag and water bottle and excited to enter the 4th grade. The first day of school was great, but we can see the signs slowly. We planned for a dinner and there he goes. I want to go to XXXX. Hmm..after some persuasions and explanations, he agrees to join us.
                       Today is Back to School night. Back to School night is conducted in the first week after school starts. All the parents have a meeting with the class teacher and the teacher explains the syllabus and her agenda for the rest of the year. Each parent sits at the child's desk and is given a sheet of 4-5 questions about their kid.

Qn 1: What is the nicest thing about your child?
I think and think and think and think

Qn2: What is an interest thing about your child?
Again I think and think and think 

Qn3: In what way do you think we can help your child this year?
The answer is spontaneous

Qn4: Any concerns about your child you would want to let us know?
The answer is instant.

Honestly, I felt so bad that I could not recollect one good thing about my son on top of my head. (Well, I recollected that he wanted to spend the little money he had, on me later; now while writing the post, but not at that time). Am I the only parent on this whole planet who is like that? or are there any other moms who share my misery? As parents, why do we have only complaints and no praises? I know that I can't rise my expectations above the bar on a 9 year old, that too a boy. Sigh!!!He'll grow up. One more wish to my never ending list of wishes; I wish I had the magical power to never lose my temper and have this idiotic smile on my face regardless of what he does and keep saying, oh! You are wonderful, my son.

32 comments:

  1. I understand ...Absolutely ha ha...My son is 3 and a half now but I know exactly how u feel :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing my pain...:) yes, boys are a handful..:)

      Delete
  2. Parenting issues :)

    I think times are changing now slowly parents talk to their kids , when i was a kid I hardly remember talking to my father , it was always via mother.

    Every child is wonderful we just have to see them that way and Talking to kids helps a lottttttt

    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree Bikram. It was the same case with my husband's dad too. We do talk to him. But you know, it's so hard. If we are strict, he becomes adamant, if we are not so strict, he takes the lenience, it's tough to balance. All he wants is play, tv, fun...you tell about studies, and he has the face as if he is carrying the burden of the world..but sure, we will talk. Thanks a lot.

      Delete
  3. The problem lies with moms and not with the kids.The kids at this age are as they should be- playsome,defiant and inquisitive.There are 101 nice things you can still find about the boy if you care to watch.Join the fun with him sporting a smile and removing the frown.These times pass away soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are right, KP sir. I wonder many times, he will be out of home in less than 10 years and time flies so quickly. I try my best to be the least demanding parent, but I get caught up in the circle of life and...

      Delete
  4. ha ha :) It happens Latha a number of times indeed.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Little boys (and girls) may be quite a handful but they are wonderful too are they not?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes Suresh. They definitely are both. Handful and wonderful. Am blessed to have both extremes..:)

      Delete
  6. I happens though their good qualities always stay top of mind for me :).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was expecting this answer from you...:) hope I could acknowledge them like you did. . :)

      Delete
    2. Looks like all my blogger friends know me so well. Of late, many friends say that we were just expecting this from you :). Moms are the best yaar even if we yell and scream, our kids know we love them to death!

      Delete
    3. Oh really? I expected it from you from your posts and the understanding of your personality :) We do naa, but am so scared these days Rachna, if I will be able to do a good job as a mom or not. Thanks for the encouragement. :)

      Delete
  7. That is the problem, Latha that when the child has so many good qualities, which ones does one mention?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Haha Prudhvi yeah understand what you say..I think our expectations are too high as they were set by our parents and that's why we leave out the other wonderful qualities they have (Like Rishi thought of getting gift for you). I always think these are our little kids and we should cut them slack I hope I will put my thought in action some day :).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are right Haritha...I believe I am not a demanding parent, yet I have my own set of complaints... I know, it's all part of that growing up. How r the girls btw? How's Snigdha doing her in school? Hope she is liking it....thx for reading irrespective of my damn bored posts...:)

      Delete
  9. hahahha :D I can only imagine how it could be !!! Parenting!!! But I must tell you from your posts :D your son is a jewel to you :D so come one you can write a post about him and dont tell me you can write few lines :D you are just being modest :D

    My love and blessings! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahha...thank u so much for the kind words Ramya...sure he is a jewel. He is a healthy happy kid. Why just a post, I can write book itself. But if the book is full of complaints, then you are not going to get bored..okay?....;)

      Delete
  10. Hi, new reader here! I have two boys, so you can come over and commiserate with me!! :P
    Honestly, your boy seems sweet that he wanted to buy you a perfume! :))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome here Mom of A and a! I was intending to visit your blog for quiet some time. Will do shortly. Sure, I will. I have someone to share my misery...:) ya, those are the sweet things that keep bringing smiles on my face on a bad day..:)

      Delete
  11. Zephyr:
    The post is poignant. Mothers are all not angels who can be smiling all the time. we are ogres, tigresses and even witches sometimes, but it is not out of anger at him or her. They know it too unless one is mean and cruel. So relax. And don't say 'you are wonderful son,' when he does something naughty. He will think you don't care about him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Big Mommy. For reinstating that a mom's instincts are not wrong. Oh ya, I am all of the above along with the title, "meanest mom in the whole wide world"...I'm happy for it though...hehe...:)

      Delete
  12. I am late in commenting but ...this post is after my heart
    Some moms can go on and on abt their kid. which I am unable to do, Don't know why. Meebe my DNA is all wrong :( I have such a problem complimenting others especially family.
    But I am learning.
    but I am amazed. He traveeld alone?? Really, that is gr8

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome here Bhagyasree..:) Late than never..thanks for the comment. I can go tongue-in-cheek about my kids..even if they are bad things...(Complaining)and I think it's a problem with my DNA too..:) i am bad at complimenting too..yes. he did travel alone and there is not much to worry. The airlines will take good care of him and in fact he called us in his stop in between.

      Delete
  13. I want to cry reading this post...because your son is so utterly sweet :" I recollected that he wanted to spend the little money he had, on me later." What a son that he wants to buy for his mom! And I want to cry because you are so honest. You are so non-pretentious. You did not write a "I am a great mom" and "learn tips of parenting from me." Rather you wrote a real endearing human mother post. I absolutely adore you, Latha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Awww..that was such a warm praise from you Bhavana. I don't know if I really deserve it though, but friends like you I make each day in strange ways keep me going. I think I inherited these traits from mom. Will have to write a post on it. thank you again..:)

      Delete
  14. Well, Parents can express their feelings in actions, but to express that in words would be difficult. One day I just asked mom to tell me one thing of which she was proud of me. She kept thinking and thinking. Now I don't say that my mom doesn;t feel proud of me. I know she does, She's expressed it in her love and affection, but words just fail us when we need to express such things ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's a very sweet comment from you Aswini..thank u so much :) May be you are right. As parents, we know it inside but unable to express on the outside..:)

      Delete
  15. such an emotional post..when mine were young, I always saw them with a critical eye..my daughter still rememebers that I scolded her for loosing one mark, forgetting the appreciation for 99.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I understand what you are saying Renu. I think, we Indian parents are like that. Here, when I go to the sports along with my son, I am surprised at how the parents here encourage. The kid would have played really worse and yet they say, you've done a great job! My boy. keep going. I really wonder how they can do it. Am learning my way through each day.

      Delete